One of the brightest people I know - and a notorious cutie pie!, - refused to wish me a Happy New Year yesterday. Instead he stated that New Year wishes are stupid. Wishes don’t change anything. It’s the actions, the daily efforts, small and big, that make a difference. Words are empty without actions. So one might just as well save his breath. I’ll tell you more. The notorious cutie pie - and one of the brightest people I know!, - also refused to make any kind of New Year resolution regarding any kind of efforts, small or big, that he will or will not try to put into action to bring himself yet closer to the all- the-wishes-come-true-this-year reality, a reality so absurdly parallel that even Hawking is starting to get upset. He - the cutie pie, not Hawking!, – happens to find making resolutions equally retarded. He’s more just-do-it kind of cutie pie,… I mean cutie guy,… I mean guy.

Moi, I have always loved a good tradition. Wishing others nice holidays and coming up with a list of resolutions for myself. Yes! Even the humongous boredom of west-European X-mases and their forced New Year's Eve effort to channel southern joyfulness by means of northern alcoholism did not manage to bring down my love for the fabulous annual tradition of resolution making. Resolutions, which I always implement, mind you…… yes, by taking actions, mind you… yes, just like the cutie pie says. No promises, either. Just old fashioned OCD induced ‘to do’ lists, that I’ll ….. well, that I’ll do.

Here they come, the glorious twelve 2012 resolutions. Flowing down effortlessly and proudly, just like any decent new year resolution list should.
1. Get a bigger place. I want a shitload of square meters. As far as the eye can see!
2. Quit the sport of beating people at their own game. It’s just not polite.
3. Save money. Spend it all on people I love.
4. Make more free time. Spend it all on people I love.
5. Quit toxic relationships. They give me puffy eyes.
6. Get more fresh air. It’s good for me.
7. Sleep more. It’s good for me and ….. those around me.
8. Quit wasting time with losers. Natural selection is there for a reason.
9. Reread fav childhood books. Those are fun! I am NOT going to read the third Eugenides this year. I mean,… maybe next year.
10. Pick a cook book and cook my way through it.
11. Quit looking for deep connections. Just face it. Dumb people don’t have any depth. Smart people won’t let you anywhere near theirs. They are afraid you’ll soon find out they don’t have any, either.
12. Get more beachwear. Soak up more sun. Find the sun.

Happy New Year, y’all! Make the best of it!